Why not Psycho-oncology?

1. Many people think working in cancer setting is not easy and it requires lot of courage to see the grief of the patients everyday. I can agree this statement to some extent only.

I see myself as a tender hearted person and I was afraid to work with special children and psychiatric patients thinking that there would so much burn out and things like that.

The truth is “I was also afraid to work in a cancer setting but my intuition said there is something for me in the field of Psycho-oncology”. So I joined with courage and I am sure that I am doing a good job here.

Cancer is no more a deadly disease. We have got wonderful treatment modalities to save the lives and also preserve their quality of life. I have treated more than 100 patients till now. Only 2 patients have died, all others are doing good. I am happy that I have contributed something when were in so much grief. Most of my job was ‘alleviating the stigma attached to the word cancer’.

2. Many people have fixed their mind to study Clinical Psychology and did not want to apply for M.Phil Psycho-oncology.

I understand that people who have fixed their mind to Clinical Psychology want to work in a hospital setting. Psycho-oncology also makes you work in a hospital setting. Only one difference is ‘In Clinical Psychology, you would work with Psychiatric Patients and In Psycho-oncology, you would work with normal people who have become neurotic because of the trauma’

3. Many other people say they want to work in the field of Counseling Psychology.

Psycho-oncology provides a wide platform to give counseling to the patients and especially family members starting from adolescent children to the geriatric population. We do almost all sorts of counseling like family counseling, marital therapy, adolescent counseling but the only difference is ‘it is centered upon cancer and its treatment’

4. Few more people say they want to work in Neuro-Psychology.
Here is also a great opportunity for those who want to do something on Neuro-Psychology. We are doing many researches in the concept called Chemo-brain. We want to know whether cancer treatment affects the neuro-psychology of the patients.

5. Finally some more people say they want to work with children.

We have got hundreds of children affected with various types of blood cancers and most of them have to be in the hospital at least for a year. We need people who have got some exposure to art and play therapy to make them ease with the treatment.

In conclusion, Psycho-oncology has so much scope and you will find your skills irrespective of your specialization readily helping people here. We also work on Tobacco Cessation otherwise called Nicotine De-addiction, in which we do lot of awareness programmes in schools, colleges and community. Thus if you are interested to work with community and have good skills in Training, Psycho-oncology is a very apt field.

Kindly disseminate the real scenario of Psycho-oncology and remove the stigma so that people can make use of the opportunity mentioned above.

You can read the following articles to know more about the field.
Why Cancer Care Needs Psychologists? http://mysynergies.blogspot.in/2011/11/why-cancer-care-needs-psychologists.html
Is Cancer Synonymous to Death? http://mysynergies.blogspot.in/2011/11/cancer-is-synonymous-to-death.htm

Challenges in identifying ‘Depression’ in Cancer Patients

Introduction

Depression is the common cold in psychiatry. No body can escape from depression. At one point or other in everybody’s life time, depression occurs. The reason behind depression varies from individual to individual. One such reason is cancer. Important issues in the life of any person with cancer may
include the following:

• Fear of death.
•  Interruption of life plans.
• Changes in body image and self-esteem.
• Changes in social role and lifestyle.
•  Money and legal concerns.

Everyone who is diagnosed with cancer will react to these issues in different ways and may not experience serious depression.

Why Depression is not given due importance in Cancer Care?

Even though observable symptoms of depression such as crying spells, social withdrawn and sad mood are present in many cancer patients, only few are recognized by the oncologists and referred for further assessment and treatment. There are many difficulties present that obstruct the patients getting appropriate treatment for depression and they will be discussed under the following headings.

ü      Related to Oncologists

Most of the oncologists think depressive symptoms are normal when facing a very serious illness like cancer. It is generally seen as sickness behavior. Except the symptoms of depressed mood, guilt/worthless and suicidal ideation, all the other symptoms of depression are similar to sickness behavior.

Since the number of oncologists is very less in India comparing with the actual requirement, they are burdened with so many patients. Their work is being shared by nurses. Nurses are usually given adequate training to understand and use the technical language of cancer but nurses are not trained to understand the psychological issues of cancer patients.

Most of the oncologists are not aware of the symptoms of psychological issues such as depression, anxiety and stress. Even if they are aware of the symptoms, they tend to ignore even they are presented to them since they have no expertise to address them.

Fatigue is a well known mental health issue in cancer. One of the symptoms of clinical depression is fatigue. With the increased awareness among cancer care professionals, depression is overlooked as fatigue. However many oncologists fail to refer to treat fatigue.

In deciding the treatment plan, the family members are given more importance rather than the patients. So the interactions between the patients and the oncologists are very less. Thus oncologists fail to recognize the patients’ mental health issues. Since the patients are not completely informed about the diagnosis and prognosis, the fear of unknown catches the patients and it may lead to depression.

The source of significant weight loss/gain and Insomnia/Hypersomnia are very difficult to find in case of cancer. There are various possibilities such as site and stage of cancer, side effects of treatment and psychological issues.

ü      Related to Patients

For cancer patients and their family members, the priority is cancer treatment. They give less importance to mental health. They themselves think the sad mood is normal irrespective of its intensity. Moreover most of the oncologists also think it is normal to undergo distress during the time of diagnosis and treatment.

The taboo to meet mental health professional is another significant challenge. People lack awareness about the mental health.

ü      Related to Psychologists

The next challenge is ‘lack of trained human resources in Psycho-oncology’. If the distress or depression is identified, it has to be addressed properly. Most of the cancer centers do not have psycho-oncology unit. Even if Psycho-oncology unit is present, the training and expertise of the unit have to be viewed seriously.

A research world wide done in the field of Psycho-oncology says the incidence of depression is 15-25% on an average. The widely used tool in hospital setting to diagnose depression is HADS. However the 7 items of HADS which measure depression are not adequately correlated with the symptoms of depression as given in DSM IV TR. Feelings of worthlessness or excessive and inappropriate guilt, significant weight loss or gain, Insomnia or hypersomnia are neglected.

In oncology setting, all the symptoms of depression may not be observable. The stage, site and type of cancer influence the behaviors of the patients. Thus it is better to develop new parameters according to the stage, site and type of the cancer. So that depression in cancer will not be left unrecognized.

ü      Related to System/Practices

The cancer treatment is packed with many procedures. Inserting Psychological tests may be regarded as a burden for the patient. There is no clear cut idea where to bring in the psychological tests whether at the time of screening or disclosing diagnosis or during the course of treatment. Even though NCCN guidelines state patients have to be screened for distress in the first visit itself, Indian oncology set up lack facilities to do it.

Conclusion:

Sustained efforts to educate medical professionals involved in cancer care such as oncologists and nurses on identifying depression and techniques to intervene will be of great help to the cancer patients who undergo depression. Patients should also be given awareness about the psychological services available for them. Psycho-oncologists have to have strong research base to convince the oncology setting to take up depression as a serious issue since depression has the potential to affect the treatment outcome. New set of criteria to recognize depression according to site, type and stage of cancer has to be developed.

Why Cancer Care needs Psychologists? – A brief note

Medical community has recognized that quality of life is as important as quantity of life. At present, psychological concerns are given increased importance in cancer care if it is compared with the past. Psycho-oncologists have the obligation to increase the human touch in cancer care from the screening to rehabilitation for the patients who are successfully treated and palliative care for patients who go through the end-of-life process.

The work of Psycho-oncologists starts from prevention aspects such as tobacco cessation and change in life style. There are many myths related to cancer. One of them is ‘cancer is synonymous to death and the treatment is very distressing’. Thus to alleviate the myths about cancer and cancer care is another responsibility of Psycho-oncologists.

All patients experience some level of distress associated with diagnosis and treatment of cancer at all stages of disease. However very fewer patients are referred for psycho-social care due to under recognition of patient’s psychological needs by primary oncology team and lack of human resources. Thus to reveal the diagnosis and prognosis for ‘difficult’ patients is one of the key responsibilities for psycho-oncologists.

Cancer affects not only the patients and also the family members to a large extent. The burden of care givers is very huge. So burn-out, stress, depression and anxiety are also very common in care givers. To deal with the distress, grief of the patients and family members is again a responsibility of Psych-oncologists.

In the past two decades, dramatic advances in early detection and treatment options have increased the over all survival rates in patients of all ages with cancer. At the same time, these improved treatment options are also associated with substantial long term side effects: fatigue, pain, anxiety and depression. Some patients develop phobias of needles, hospital and blood or conditioned nausea/vomiting related to chemotherapy. Cognitive impairment associated with chemotherapy (often referred as ‘chemobrain’) has also been described in patients with advanced cancer especially CNS Cancers and brain metastases. When it comes to treatment through oral medications, depression and anxiety are the risk factors for non-compliance. It is a responsibility of Psych-oncologist to make the patients comply with the treatment process and treat the mental health issues.

Last but not the least, the health professionals involved in cancer care go through lot of difficulties to deal with the disease and patients. Job satisfaction of health professionals to work is a key factor to maintain the quality of cancer care. Psycho-oncologists take care of their mental health and preserve their quality of life.

Cancer is synonymous to death???

Many people think that cancer often leads to death and it is a killer disease. It IS a big myth. There are many survivors of cancer. Almost all the cancers are curable if they are treated in the early stage. So what we need is ‘AWARENESS’.

There are many more myths available when you talk of cancer and using tobacco.

1.       I will not get cancer.

Cancer is a disease of cells. When the cells divide in the process of metabolism, due to some unknown factor(s) the DNA programming of cells loses the control over the division of cells. And so cells keep growing uncontrollably.

So whoever has cells (all of us) is capable of developing cancer.

2.       Only tobacco usage can cause cancer.

 “The exact cause for cancer is still unknown. Even though some carcinogens (cancer causing agents) are found, the mechanism how DNA programming of cells is changed by carcinogens could not e found in spite of medical advancement.

For tobacco to cause cancer, it takes so many years. Tobacco is a very slow killer. A person who was using tobacco in his young age can develop cancer in his old age also. So, NOT getting into the habit is what the best solution.

3.       Tobacco is less harmful than alcohol, marijuana and other addictive drugs.

Just because using tobacco is culturally accepted, it does not mean it is less harmful. Nicotine is the most addictive substance in the world. That’s why quitting tobacco usage/smoking is very much difficult when compared to other addictions. Using tobacco leads to so many complications for both physical and as well as psychological health.

4.       Branded/Menthol cigarettes are not harmful.

All Branded/Menthol cigarettes also have almost the same amount of nicotine and other carcinogens (that lead to cancer).

5.       Gutka/Pan masala will not lead to cancer unlike cigarette or beedi.

In India, almost 70% of tobacco usage is in the form of smokeless tobacco i.e. Gutka/Pan masala and Snuff powder (Brand Names: Hans, Pan Parag, Manick Chand and etc). The consumption of smokeless/chewing tobacco has been increasing every year. There is a high correlation for smokeless tobacco to cancer when compared to smoking tobacco. The gutka/pan masala damages the cells in the mouth where they are placed and change the biological functioning of cells that lead to cancer.

6.       Foreign country treatment can cure cancer.

Almost India has got all the advanced treatment methods to treat cancer. If the cancer is in advanced stage, objective of the treatment would be ‘pronging life’ and never cure. Many of the treatment methods for advanced cancers in foreign countries are still experimental and not proven enough to cure the disease.

7.       Alternate medicines have certain cure for cancer even if it is advanced

No alternate medicine has proven scientifically to cure cancer in advanced stage.

8.       People with cancer must remain confined in a hospital bed.

Not necessarily. It is based on the site and stage of cancer. 

To Nagarathaar Community from a Psychologist

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Re-searching Myself!

Research=Re + Search; ‘Keep Searching for facts/truth’ has become the essential part of any field nowadays. With the advent of Internet Revolution and Satellite Technology, one has to equip to compete with global standards. All the global standards are the outcome of carefully done researches. Especially as a student of Behavioral Science, the arena is much wider for the Research.

To a significant extent, my values, beliefs, attitude and understanding of myself have changed after studying Research Methodology and doing Researches as a part of curricula. Research Methodology provides pathway to objective and proof based beliefs and values. It triggers the curiosity to explore the real cause(s) of any behavior or event.

The one who has done research in a highly effective manner is given Ph.D. He is honored and believed to be a great man in a particular field because he should have done everything scientifically following the Research Methodology and is able to respond the quarries raised with proof based answers. It is believed that he would have studied everything related to his field and is considered and consulted as an expert in the field.

There is a Tamil Proverb-“Kannal Kaanpathum Poi, Kaadhal Ketpathum Poi, Theera Visarippathae Mei” meaning whatever we see, hear may be illusory but scientific enquiry makes us to find the facts. There is a Thirukkural (written by Thiruvalluar)-“EpporuL Yaar-yaar Vaay Kaetpinum ApporuL MeiporuL Kaanbathu Arivu” meaning whatever we hear from others must be examined and that’s the sign of possessing analytical sense. Do we all thus

posses the so called ‘Analytical Sense’?! L

I would tell you, don’t believe in God until you really (scientifically!?) find He is there, because the belief in God sometimes makes you irrational. According to Albert Ellis, a famous Psychotherapist (Founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy-REBT) says, “Believing in God is also irrational in addition to many others”

You may tell me, “Everything cannot be found by Science such as existence of God” Yes, of course, I agree. But please accept that Science is in the process of finding facts to a great extent and all of us tasting the fruits of science in the form of Technology.

The life without knowing the facts have been leading to superstitions. Until recent times, we kept Leprosy as a harmful disease which was believed to be a curse and now it is found that Leprosy can be cured with proper medications! It is the outcome of Research. Paradigm shifts take place as an effect of Researches all over the world.

Generally speaking, we keep judging everything with our previous experience and no knowledge update takes place. Updating knowledge through various resources would enhance the Perceiving ability instead of judging.

Thus in whatever we see, hear, smell, understand and do, they have to be correlated with the scientific facts that are found from recent researches. I know it is not that easy but can be done step by step.

Let’s come out and explore the world with no preconceived notions and as it is!!

British India and Indian India

We see many injustices and unfair things happening everywhere in our country. If you compare British India and this Indian India, more or less it is the same situation. The superiors of this state and many other people exploit us and manage the agitations by many ways; they are ready to do anything for the sake of their livelihood and maintain their social and monitory status.

The full stop can be put only by attracting people for support against those dangerous persons through various strategies. The strategy used by Gandhi at that time is Non-Violence. It was powerful due the reason that they followed the Path of Truth in which most of the lay men believe and the British did not expect non-violence to be the reaction for violence and so they respected it. It is applicable for Indian India also.

The best non-violence strategy that we have in this Indian India is MEDIA through which we can make anything happen. That’s why people who want to exploit us have taken Media in their hands, but I reckon it is not possible all the time to hide the truth. So using media in an effective way is the need of the hour more importantly. It must be continuous because lay men will forget the issues if some distraction takes place.

People who stand for truth and justice have to be both firm and effective in bringing the issues to the public who are least bothered about them. The freedom fighters were firm when the mere existence of Indians became a question in British India. So only-when the mere existence becomes a question, the sufferers join together. If the exploiter is such a person who knows the psychology of the sufferers or who has a psychologist with him will never make people to get into the question of existence, they will both exploit and do something good to retain power on lay men.

Bringing the issues to the public is the only way to eradicate exploitation through media, because everyone is afraid of public in one matter or another. If and only if the followers of truth know the psychology of both lay men and exploiters, can use the media effectively to communicate their ideologies to the public and stop people not to become their hand toys, it is possible to hoard the truth.

Then agitation from lay men will be initiated with the immediate cause of emotions but once it is started, intelligence should play the role to eradicate exploitation further for which the people of justice must have studied or known a lot about dealing people.

I write this after seeing a film Aayutham Seivom, Strike in Madras School of Social Work, Strike in Madurai American College and the status of Vellore Vallalar Middle School.

For many of us, the God has given us a lot of chances to understand this real world without affecting our routine life. I believe, everyone is born for a noble cause. Let us continue our covert observations and understand the things better. Let us wait for the right time to take serious efforts in our journey towards Truth and God.

Cinema - Modern Form of Literature

Yes, cinema has become the modern form of literature. It has taken away the place of Epics, Poems, Short stories, novels, plays and even music concerts.

Literature is the one which shows the real life with some exaggeration to attract the people. In olden days, the epics, poems, short stories, novels and plays were doing it but nowadays Cinema has stolen all their significance. Cinema shows real life situations with the help of some characters mainly Hero and Heroin. The directors are able to show their philosophies and ideals with a perfect mixture of love, comedy, sentiments.

Cinema registers / reflects the culture, fashion and mindset of the people of the time. The Directors have the responsibility of leading the society/nation. They are the one who influence lay men more than any political leaders and freedom fighters or social leaders.

While it is shown in the screen, it deeply goes inside the minds of the fans. So it may be violence or non violence. The Heroes have become most of their role models. Whatever is done by Heroes in cinema are known as heroic deeds even if they do the deeds for mere money and with many shots. Lay men start to believe that the heroes in the picture are really heroes in real lives.

Psychologically speaking, the people who like certain heroes in the films consider that they themselves are doing those heroic deeds. People fulfill their desire to perform heroic deeds at least seeing such kind of movies and satisfy their egos. An economically poor fan feels that he himself is a hero and loves a very rich girl which would happen in Utopia only.

We must be able to distinguish the realistic and unrealistic actions of cinema. Most of the Producers, Directors and Actors use the film industry to develop themselves in Status, Money and Popularity. Only some of them are really concerned about the society. While such films are released, there are no men to see that film.

I think the wise men choose their movies by directors and story but lay men choose the movie by hero and heroin. Let us think and choose films which would develop our mental activity and philosophy.

Again psychologically speaking, we can find the personality from one’s favorite movies.

My Favorite Movies are (Thinking that I am a wise man) Aaytha Ezhuthu, Anbe Sivam, Ayiutham Seivom, Bombay, Four Students, Gentle Man, Indhian, Iruvar, Mudhalvan, Pudhiya Mugam, Ramana, Ratchagan, Samurai, Sillunnu Oru Kadhal, Unnalae Unnale, Kandukondaen Kandukondean, Nandha, Vasool Raja MBBS, Jeyam Kondaan, Mugavari, Naan Kadavul, Veiyil, Jab we met, Titanic, Slum dog millionaire etc..

Can U find my personality?! :-D

Opinion, Thinking and Uniqueness

The very basic concept of Psychology is ‘every individual is unique’. No two men are alike in thinking and perceiving since they are from different backgrounds, have different experiences and posses different thinking patterns. In other words, the God created everyone to be different. Even twins of the same background are different. It is natural and normal to have difference in Thinking & Opinion.

Only because of difference in thinking, we progress everyday, formulate new concepts, invent and discover so many things and make the world a better living place. Assume that everyone in this world think and perceive alike, what will happen? I would say there will be no development and interest in living; everything will be static.

As social animals, we must have relationship with others in the society. The relationship may be with the marital partner, friend, class mate or just a co-passenger in the bus. It is natural to have a difference of opinion in the relationship. The difference of opinion can be called as conflict and it is a part and parcel of our lives.

Solving conflicts makes the relationship healthy and better. If relationships are to be continued, we need to accept and accommodate others ideas some times, be assertive some times or adjust some other times. While we want to be assertive, we should clearly express ourselves about what we think about the conflict so that others can accommodate our ideas. To avoid conflicts, we follow some common rules, codes and conducts in the social relationships. One of the examples is Traffic Rules to avoid conflicts in the travel. As far as personal relationship is concerned, we lack in that. It is necessary to formulate the rules consciously for personal relationships according to our life experiences and consulting with the others who engage in the relationship.

Likewise for the same action by an individual, people give various opinions; some appreciate; some comment badly; some others are neutral. The opinion differs just because of the meaning that people attach as a result of the previous experiences. The negative opinions are otherwise called as feedbacks. As a result of different perceptions, we receive negative feedbacks from others as long as we live in this world. The important thing is how we take the feedbacks, either take it easy or worry. To avoid worries, we have to be open-minded and take them into our consideration. If they are not acceptable, just leave them. If the feedbacks are true, work on them and develop the skills to achieve greater heights. The one who gets feedbacks is lucky and can improve a lot. So be proud of getting feedbacks.

We should also understand that the only way to know about people is to analyze others’ actions and make comments on them. Likewise it is natural for others also analyze our behavior and make comments.

Concerning the difference in thinking, give feedbacks to others and receive feedbacks from others in an acceptable way to have a healthy relationship with everyone which would ultimately make people of this world better.

(Short) Speech by Chetan Bhagat..

Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order. There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school.

Where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.

Don't be serious, be sincere

Happiness

We always expect happiness in our life which never happens. The life has always been a mixture of both happiness and sorrow. We keep probing the cause of sorrow and find fault either with others or ourselves.

Take an instance where we want to obtain first mark in our exams for which we know the way that we should prepare a lot.
Like that, to attain happiness in our life, we should know the way.

First we must ask the question that while we want happiness, we often get sorrow in our life and why is that so? Here we get into the same philosophical question asked by great social thinkers and philosophers like Buddha and Gandhi. Please look at their life and understand their answer for the same question. Buddha says Desire is the source of all sorrows. Gandhi says Sorrow is due to sin following law of Karma.

More or less they say the same concept. We all know a sangam poem starting “Yadhum Ooere Yaavarum Kaeleer” meaning all the places on earth is our hometown by Kanian Poongundranar. The second line of the poem says ”Theethum Nandrum Pirar Thara Vaara” meaning good and bad come by our own deeds.

If you believe this, you can answer the question, why do we face misery? We find fault and become angry with the people who makes us to feel sorrow. We ask the question to them ”What have done to you? Did I do anything wrong to you?” We think that I have done nothing wrong to you then how can you make me to feel sorrow.

Here lies the truth that the sorrow is not due to the others but YOU.

The person does something to you which makes you to feel misery is a TOOL to balance your deeds. The bad deed done by you to some one else is balanced by another deed by some other person.

This is like Newton’s third law “Every action has equal and opposite reaction”. This is what I believe.
I am sure that you will also be happy forever following this!

Mail sent by Narayan Murthy to all Infosys staff:

It's half past 8 in the office but the lights are still on... PCs still running, coffee machines still buzzing... And who's at work? Most of them ??? Take a closer look... All or most specimens are ?? Something male species of the human race... Look closer... again all or most of them are bachelors... And why are they sitting late? Working hard? No way!!! Any guesses???

Let's ask one of them... Here's what he says.... "What's there 2 do after going home...Here we get to surf, AC, phone, food, coffee that is why I am working late...Importantly no bossssssss!!!!!!!!!!!" This is the scene in most research centers and software companies and other off-shore offices. Bachelors "Time-passing" during late hours in the office just bcoz they say they've nothing else to do... Now what r the consequences... "Working" (for the record only) late hours soon becomes part of the institute or company culture. With bosses more than eager to provide support to those "working" late in the form of taxi vouchers, food vouchers and of course good feedback, (oh, he's a hard worker... goes home only to change..!!). They aren't helping things too... To hell with bosses who don't understand the difference between "sitting" late and "working" late!!! Very soon, the boss start expecting all employees to put in extra working hours. So, My dear Bachelors let me tell you, life changes when u get married and start having a family... office is no longer a priority, family is... and That's when the problem starts... b'coz u start having commitments at home too. For your boss, the earlier "hardworking" guy suddenly seems to become a "early leaver" even if u leave an hour after regular time... after doing the same amount of work.

People leaving on time after doing their tasks for the day are labelled as work-shirkers... Girls who thankfully always (its changing nowadays... though) leave on time are labelled as "not up to it". All the while, the bachelors pat their own backs and carry on "working" not realizing that they r spoiling the work culture at their own place and never realize that they would have to regret at one point of time.. So what's the moral of the story?? * Very clear, LEAVE ON TIME!!! * Never put in extra time " unless really needed " *

Don't stay back unnecessarily and spoil your company work culture which will in turn cause inconvenience to you and your colleagues. There are hundred other things to do in the evening.. Learn music... Learn a foreign language... Try a sport... TT, cricket......... Importantly, get a girl friend or boy friend, take him/her around town... * And for heaven's sake, net cafe rates have dropped to an all-time low (plus, no fire-walls) and try cooking for a change. Take a tip from the Smirnoff ad: *"Life's calling, where are you??"* Please pass on this message to all those colleagues and please do it before leaving time, don't stay back till midnight to forward this!!!

IT'S A TYPICAL INDIAN MENTALITY THAT WORKING FOR LONG HOURS MEANS VERY HARD WORKING & 100% COMMITMENT ETC. PEOPLE WHO REGULARLY SIT LATE IN THE OFFICE DON'T KNOW TO MANAGE THEIR TIME. SIMPLE ! Regards, NARAYAN MURTHY.

Some Inspring Quotes

Ship is always safe at shore... but is is not built for it

Falling down is not defeat...defeat is when your refuse to get up...

To the world you might be one person,
but to one person you just might be the world

Never expect things to happen..
struggle and make them happen.

The Duck looks smooth & calm on top of water but underneath there is a restless pedaling!
Nothing is worth than struggle!

Every king was once a crying baby;Every great building was once a blue print; It's not where U r today but where you have to be tomorrow!!

It’s estimated that millions of trees in the world were accidentally planted by Squirrels who bury nuts and then forget where they bury them. Do good and forget!!

When it rains, all birds occupy shelter, but eagle avoids rain by flying above the clouds. Problem is common to all, but attitude makes us different!

A favorite Quote to define nature of life: “On the best or the worst day, the sun finally sets” –Jeffrey Deaver

The past is a history, the future is a mystry and today is a gift, that's why we call it as "Present"!!

Life is 10% how you make it and remaining 90% is how you take it!

Everymorning you have 2 choices! Continue sleep with dreaming or wake ups and chase your dreams. Choice is yours!

Everything changes except "the change"!

Crazy Human: We work for making better tomorrow, but when tomorrow comes, instead of enjoying it, again we start thinking for better tomorrow!

Never judge a person by hi/her appearence because time has the power ro change a useless charcoal to a valuable diamond!

A clay pot having Honey will be ranked higher than the golden pot having poison. So not our outer glamour but our inner virtues/values make us valuable!

Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but does not take you anywhere!

Education and Employement

"Here we are seeing many youngsters searching for employment. The youngster may be your friend or your brother/sister or yourself. We have to come over many hurdles such as aptitude test, group discussion and many rounds of interviews to get a decent Job. Many feel very hard to come over and find such a good Job.We study well and score good marks still find it difficult to be recruited. Employers do many kinds of analysis in us in recruitment process.

Many often recruitment is elimination rather than selection. They find very few people suitable for their companies.Here comes a series of questions such as what do the employers expect from candidates? Why do they conduct many tests before employing? Even if one clears all them in the recruitment process, why is she/he not put into the right job directly?The answers from HR managers are as follows “We expect integrity, logic, creativity, vision, soft skills and finally the ability to articulate in English.” The tests & interviews conducted can reveal the personality.

If employers are satisfied in all them, they will let the candidates to become trainees. Often times, the selected are given proper training by the concern, regarding their process. Even then, the company is not ready to risk by putting the trainees into process, they conduct tests again and again to know whether the trainees understand the whole process and attain the eligibility of becoming employees. Even after that, they are asked to do budding. After getting satisfied, finally they put the employees into the process and allow them to do the job on their own.The companies look for the best potential employees even for the lowest job in the organization due to the supposition that one day the employee at lower level will reach the highest.The fact is ‘many lack whatever listed by the HR Mangers’. It is seen that more than 70% of youngsters, coming to the recruitment process are not eligible. As it is a huge number, it is clear that it is wrong to find fault with the individuals and there is something wrong with the system.

In the younger stage, we are put into education to lead the rest of our life better. Here we have to define what education is. The etymological meaning of the term - Education is 'to draw out', facilitating realization of self-potential and latent talents of an individual. Does it happen in the education system in which we have been studying?We are all trained by the education system which made us most of times not to think, simply mugging up and just vomiting the same in exams. As soon as exams are over, we are forgetting everything, taking rest and are getting ready to start memorizing for the next exams. Is there anything to do with creativity and thinking which are expected by employers?We should accept the fact that few things in the system lead us to think and not the all.

Many new systems like Montessori, Choice Based Credit System (CBCS) pave way for thinking & creativity. We should believe that a better education system will be implemented in the near future as foreign countries have. But what is about the present? It is not advisable to find fault with the system. We ourselves must be aware that schools and colleges can never provide a holistic form of education.

Integrity, soft skills, logical thinking, creativity, and vision are the things that can be shaped by family, economic activities, playing games and interacting with people which are otherwise called as extra curricular activities. We should understand that extra curricular activities are not only participating in competitions.

Most importantly, Part-time jobs can implant all the above skills in us. Jobs during studies would be a rehearsal for the future jobs. The summer holidays are fast approaching. Hence we will make these holidays in doing extra curricular activities. The humble request is “Please don’t do the same classroom activities which you do all the time” We are given holidays to refresh ourselves. We can make use of the media such as news papers, magazines and internet to understand the world out side educational institutes. So that we all can be eligible to be employed and become better which in turn make India, a developed country."

i am in chennai?!

I have been in Chennai for the past seven months. Chennai, one of the four metropolitan cities of India is a place which welcomes the people of many parts of India especially villagers like me.

I had to write an entrance examination with three rounds which were tough to enter into Chennai. The one who wants to step into Chennai with a good status must come over many obstacles like Group Discussion, two or three interviews.

I too registered my citizenship in Chennai with great dreams like many other villagers of south Tamil Nadu. I wondered about the big buildings, electric trains, fast moving noiseless vehicles. Now I have become a part & parcel of the things about which I wondered. I am working in a eight storied building, traveling everyday in the electric train, going home from office by a cab- a fast moving, noiseless vehicle. Funny, my friends in Madurai call me ‘Madraskaran’I am able to see auto drivers with butler English and camera cell phones, bus conductors with automatic ticket machines, repeatedly blocking traffic signals, fast moving vehicles and busy men concentrating on their own business who are so much concerned about their material life.

When I had been informed that Madraskararkal(Madras Men) lead a mechanical life, pay for pure water, terrific traffic problems, I thought ”oh! It’s not our problem! I am going to settle in somewhere in south Tamil Nadu, why should we worry about that?!” But the fate has sent me to live a life of Madraskaran!

I thought that Chennai would be yet another place like Cudaloor, Vellore, Sivagangai, Madurai and Paramakudi where I lived in the past which made little changes in my life. But Chennai has registered a great transformation in my life. To become a real citizen of Chennai, I am required to change myself in many aspects to fit in. Some of them are walking fast, inserting my shirt, well shaven face, lifting a suit case, introduce more English words in Tamil conversations, often browse, scrap in Orkut, probing cell phone, eat sandwich, use ATM cum debit card, book tickets by net banking and many more.

When I go to my hometown- Rameswaram, I may miss ATMs, browsing centers, 10 radio stations and cell phone towers but I find my mother with adai dosai, sparrows entering into kitchen, peace giving temple, homely girls and wave less sea. In spite of missing all these things, I have come to Chennai for the reason that I cannot get a job with a good salary, a modern cafeteria, cushion chair to sit, an A/C Hall to work, a cab to pick up & drop, colleagues calling by first name and english speaking environment there in my hometown.

In a way, I am lucky because I am able to enjoy both the city life and village life where as most of the people are able to enjoy only one kind of life.

My thoughts on Valentine’s Day

As every one of us knows this day is Valentine’s. It’s most appropriate to contemplate on Love which is regarded as affection, attachment, altruism, reciprocation, commitment, emotional intimacy and passion. It keeps its dimensions open for centuries in the human history.
We consider Love as divine, holy and sacred. But I think it is nothing wrong to say that it’s a mere force of nature which tends people towards opposite gender in order to fulfill the instruction of procreation. Of course, we are like animals in this but as analytical beings, we make much difference.
We want a mate to be with us as a friend, guide and motivator to fulfill the needs of nature including reproduction. Social Thinkers comprehend reproduction as our duty & responsibility concerning the law of nature and society by which we help the humanity to move towards evolution and to keep its survival.
If you find some person who cares for you and with whom you feel happy & secure, keep up self-confidence which would launch you in peaks, express her/ him your love. Most importantly, the other must also feel all the above in you. Even the other does not accept your love; you have fulfilled your desire of expressing your feeling. Hence you will never have a gut feeling”Oh! I could have expressed my desire?!”
If you are not able to find such person to love or some one did not accept your proposal with whom you felt all the above , submit the effort of finding perfect match in the hands of the time and your parents. Please don’t toil for it. If you start taking efforts for it, you may have to squander your precious time which would ultimately leave you in streets.

You need not feel uneasy while others have their partners and you don't have. Feel the pleasure of waiting to find the perfect.

If you have started loving, you have look upon my view as follows,

I have seen two types of lovers. The first is "Speaking for hours and hours by cell phone, spend money unnecessarily to go to park, beach & Cinema, letting everyone know of their love, marrying without the acceptance of beloved family members, finally hate each other and become seperated" The second is "Spending time to reach their goals in life, motivating each other to become better human beings, waiting for right time to come for meeting, being patient to grab the acceptence from their family members & marrying, living an ideal life" As my description suggests, I would stand for the second.

The next thing is commercialization of Love. Do you know that before 10 years, Valentine’s Day was not celebrated as we celebrate now? It’s truly commercialized so that we sense its attendance all over the world even in villages which is why the advertisements say “Gift your dear ones to show how much you love”. Do the real lovers expect gifts to greet each other?, it is the cleverness of promoting their products.
I perceive love as a personal affair between two individuals. Actually St. Valentine wants the day to greet and express love that we have.
It is fine to gift your dear ones with in your affordability and seldom fine to be brainwashed by advertisements.
So let us all enjoy the Valentine’s Day with these little thoughts.

My Thoughts on Love

My thoughts on Love
As every one of us knows, man is a social animal. The term ’social’ refers to the idea that man cannot live alone and the term ‘animal’ refers to the idea that man is still animal having all the barbarian characters. Often times, we show animal characters especially Anger, Jealousy and anxiety. But he has an animal character which makes the humanity to evolve. And that is called Love.
In a globalizing era, we have been following Utilitarianism. We do everything for our benefit. As man is a social animal, he wants other men to be with him. The benefit of that is the possibility of sharing our own happiness and miseries. Hence we love/ like/ have affection on some one and with expectations. The form of expectation differs but it remains as expectation only. Think of the people who you love so much and say whether your love is not towards expectation. It’s the fact that in one way or another we expect from the loving people. I want to remind you that there is nothing wrong in it, because everyone of this world is behaving like you. If something is done by only some men then it may be viewed differently. If every one is making the same then it is universally accepted.
As an analytical being, we have to get into new perspective regarding Love which binds everyone of this world. We have to concentrate on the term ‘Expectation’ here. While we are not able to find the fulfillment of our expectation from others and from ourselves, Love turns to Enmity, Jealousy and Anger. Then is it possible to love someone with expecting nothing?
But we can try out the possibility of minimizing expectations. Then it may be easy for us to evolve as better humans. You may able to see this kind of love in some people who are beside like your mother or father. Almost in our lives, we see that our parents do their duty of bringing up us and expect very minimum. Think of some social leaders who loved the humanity. What was their expectation level? Please do not think they are divine beings and we cannot be like them as we are all lay men.
Can we all minimize our expectations while loving people? If you minimize your expectations, others who are loved by us will automatically minimize their expectations. It’s nothing but Newton’s Third Law. Kindly remember that people are the real assets who double our happiness and make half our sorrows.

My Thoughts on Education

A child can understand the language(s) in which mother speaks with the child. So mother tongue can refer the language(s) in which mother speaks with the children. It extends to father, other family members and the peer group only after mother.Education in English Medium is perfect when Mother and others speak with the children in English starting from the birth. Many parents admit their children in English Medium schools to make them efficient in English. The Assumption of the parents is English Medium would help their children to understand the world, to become professionals and to compete in the job market better than them. Does it happen really?
In many occurrences, students studying in English Medium are not able to understand whet ever they study even their mother tongue as subject. It is just because the education does not kinder their thinking power. They simply memorize and forget after exams are over. Why children are educated? They are put in educational institutes to lead their rest of life better. The base of the life building is education. If the base is not strong, then the building would surely be pathetic. If children are not able to understand the things of the base then how can they build their life building?Here we have to define what education is. The etymological meaning of the term - Education is 'to draw out', facilitating realization of self-potential and latent talents of an individual. Does it happen in the education system in which we have been studying?
It is not advisable to find fault with the system prior to finding fault with our ability of decision making. We have to think, discuss with friends and relatives and decide the best educational institute in which our children are going to be admitted. We lack in thinking just because we too are parts of the same education system. Our parents might have done the same mistake. Should we too do the same mistake even after knowing a thing is wrong?Hence try the possibility of admitting your children in the medium of the children’s mother tongue. Kindly ensure that the educational institute is well equipped which serves all the functions of education.
Now assume that you are a parant. You want to admit your children in English medium schools due to so many reasons, then you should ensure whether your children understand and manipulate whatever they are given in the educational istitutes and thier tuition centers. If not, think of the safety measures those you take. Sit with them and find their difficulties and ponder about solving their problems. You yourself may take special care or ask someone else like sending to pioneers in this field of interest. It is my opinion that none other than parents can solve this problem. Parent must take initiatives for their children’s education. Others may not be as effective as the parents. If the above things are not able to be done, it is better to change the medium with sufficient safety measures or the parents must equip themselves to guide their children in right path.Are you able to fill all the above mentioned blanks of your children’s education in reality?